This is a new site!


The Parenting Post Divorce program of the Center for Creative Conflict Resolution has been in development for many years.  In the Spring of 2009 it became a designated program of the Center with its own standards and protocol.  The home page of this site will give you full and current information about the structure and process of the program.

It is often helpful for parents to know how other parents are dealing with similar situations to the ones they are struggling with.  This blog will be a place to which I will be publishing brief and anonymous accounts of actual situations that I am addressing within the Parenting Post Divorce program.  I hope you find this helpful.

Family Law and Applications of Creative Conflict Resolution

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In recent months I have been paying particular attention to the applications of Creative Conflict Resolution to issues in matters of intervention with families who are experiencing such a high level of conflict that the Family Court has become involved. This may be through allegations of abuse, through a petition for divorce, or by aggressive behavior on the part of a minor. I have identified four areas wherein the application of the tools of Creative Conflict Resolution are appropriate and helpful. I want to spell these out at greater length in the future, but for now let me just amplify the four contexts.

Powerlessness and Perspectives

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A mother of an eight year old daughter who is having severe emotional problems has come to me for help with the conflicts she is having with the girl’s father.  Their brief marriage ended just after the girl was born. 

There are a couple of upcoming meetings with the daughter’s school and with the clinic which is addressing her emotional problems.  These meetings could be held separately with mom and dad or they could happen together.  It is hard for the parents to be in the same room with each other but Mom wants to work at addressing the issues between her and Dad so that their daughter experiences less stress.

When Mom received an email from school about the plan for separate meetings she hit “reply all” and suggested they meet together.  She then contacted Dad to suggest that they should work at working together.  He replied that she was once again trying to control everything and that he had set up a separate meeting.

Mom wrote to me aware that the feelings she had discovered of a sense of strength and purpose in acting on behalf of her daughter had withered in the face of Dad’s attack.  She was again feeling sad and weak.

My response to her: I hear your discouragement at how Dad is showing up in the relationship with you and that your efforts at reconciliation are no match for his efforts at alienation.  You are noticing that the feelings you have about yourself for what you are trying to do changed back in just 24 hours and you would like to recover a sense of power and purpose.  So let me offer a couple of observations.

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